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It's sock lint that gets stuck between your toes
For I put you on under my shoe
And I wear you when I walk down the street
And you like me so much that
Pieces of you stick to my feet
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I was steering a carriage with Kamyar by my side
He was holding an old battery and just enjoying the ride
We were watching the mountains as they slowly rolled by
We had no idea that we were soon to die
We had no idea this was the day that we would die
Skull of a bull in the distance, cacti like cardboard cutouts
Vultures feed on fallen food, sure is hot out here
Kamyar saw some cattle, and the horses saw 'em also
Stampede wandering rather close with not too far to go
I kept my cool and I bid my horses hurry on
They trotted faster to avoid meeting them cows head on
The road it got quite rocky, and the carriage began to shake
Kamyar's nose began to itch, and he sneezed-- a mistake
That battery fell sideways, and it hit me in the hand
The fluid ate through my control, which at my feet did land
The horses didn't know what to do-- their guidance now in shambles
They steered us quickly off the road, and then we all got trampled
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3. |
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Holey Moley-- Andrew's got the lamb chops!
Behold the lamb chops that are stuck to his skin.
The holy lamb chops that are stuck to his skin.
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We mosh at family reunions and stage dive at Christmas time
Aunt Bertha writes ear-splitting songs that don't ever rhyme
My mom was raised to thrash, and Grandpa plays the drums
Uncle Joe shreds as we bang our heads, and Grandma grimes her gums
Sing death metal, Grandma! It gets better every time.
I'm the only gut with a grandma that gargles razor blades
Thrashing and swirling her silver hair, she plays bass lines like an earthquake
She shakes our hearts and loosens all our teeth
It's always fun and there is no one to tell us to turn it down
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Cat Dog Tiger Panther
Lion Hamster Mouse Duck.
In the pet store I am stuck.
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I'm going to eat waffles 'til they come out my nostrils
Missing breakfast would be awful, but here it is unlawful
Syrup just covers the taste, just hides the joy,
Just drowns my reason to awake
A fork would bring the taste of metal to the meal
I eat with my hands
Bathe my dog in the stuff
Syrup kills fleas but attracts honey bees
He eats them
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When you tell those funny jokes, I laugh until I cry
In this entire world, I would say that you're the most humorous guy
You're hilarious to me
See the cartoons that you draw
You know they really send me on a trip
You should be a comedian or a writer for a comic strip
You're hilarious to me
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Raisins, peanuts, dried bananas, sunflower seeds
Chocolate chips, yogurt-covered raisins, dry cereal, mini pretzels
Raw rice grains, cracker crumbs, chow mein noodles, little lentils
Motorcycles, bits of gravel, flower petals, small animals
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9. |
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There's big, small, all sorts of funny feet
Sneaker, bare, nail-polished toenail feet
Pretty, ugly, athlete's-foot infested feet
Hairy, wrinkled, blue slipper-covered feet
Furry, cute, black and white moo-cow feet
Odd, normal, different kinds of crazy feet
Gator, monkey, even kangaroo feet
Big toes, small toes, even baby newborn feet
Flat, curved, Dr. Scholl's perfect feet
Big feet, small feet, God created all the feet.
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Taste buds the size of ping pong balls
Oral muscle a foot wide and three feet tall
If there's something to taste, throw it at his face
The telephone gets wet when he makes a call
Mr. Tongue hasn't got a head
He's got a tongue instead
Lollipops go fast and popsicles don't last
Gotten sick wearing face make-up in times past
Every hat is drenched, every kiss is french
Leaves a salivary head print when he leans against the glass
When he sleeps at night, his whole head goes dry
Tastes the salty tears every time he cries
Chlorinated pools give him toxic drool
Wets ten postage stamps at a time
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Stands there and he slaps the house
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Get hit by a car, then fall down
Then get run over by the car that hit
I like getting shots
I like throwing pots and pans all over the place
Burn your houses down and leave your pets
Dine in a Mexican restaurant, and request no water
"...no matter what I say."
Walk on a hot, sandy beach on a sunny day
And wear no shoes, and burn your shoes
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You've got your toe in my salad
You put your sock in my oven
You've got your toenail clippers in my refrigerator
You're impolitely stepping on my supper
It's not nice
You better think twice
You put your food in my shoe
You left your nail polish in my dog's food
And your dirty laundry on my staircase
You stuck your nose in my business
I suggest you mind your own business
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16. |
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Mistaken For A gherkin
I like bite-sized bananas, but the waiter's color-blind
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Fifteen panthers walking single file on a diving board
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19. |
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I have a message for all the people out there:
Don't be like me. Don't do what I did, children
My throat is now dry as a grain of salt
Soon I wiil die, and it's all my fault
There's no excuse. Trying to escape is no use.
You'd understand, honey, if you were in my shoes
I've a bona fide case of,
a soul-achin' case of the climbing tree blues
"Climb it up-- you won't get cut," the girl with the red hair said
As it is, there's a growl in my gut, and I tell you:
I'd be better off dead
I've been around to so many places,
But I've never been in the place that I am, and I don't like it
If I could go back and change it,
I'd have walked right past that door, man
Then I could run and hide and dance and sing
But as it is, I ain't got the chance to do much of anything
'Cept untie and retie my shoes
I'm down up in the air with the climbing true blues
There's no excuse. Climbing tree blues.
I said I'm stuck. They sold my truck.
It isn't good. I've got no food.
This is not a lie. This branch is too high.
Will I grow old? Will I get cold?
I've got news: Climbing tree blues.
That woman, she walked away
When I've climbed high enough to have to stay
I'm up thirty feet. I ain't got nothing to eat.
Guess I'll just wait for a stopping heart rate.
I've paid my dues. Climbing tree blues.
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20. |
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21. |
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released October 25, 2011
all songs by andre.W except:
Lamb Chops- by Aaron; 8 Animal Monday- by andre.W & Nancy Ravey; Many Feets Of The World- by andre.W & Alece Ronzino; and Marmoset- by andre.W & Link.
Thank You:
Cullens (for the space to play), Samandaris, Fredettes, Parkers, Bents, Chevaliers', Mike Firkey, Gagnes, Hayes', Morgans, Richlands, Ray Burton, Roland "Skippy" Ludlam II, Rich and Tracy Simmons, Adam Laroche, Jen Dillner, Adam Sawyer, John Devereaux, Kevin Montgomery, Chris Sylvester, Chip Sawyer, Marc Vinci, Rae McRae, Heather Holsopple, Dallas Stewart, Jeff Crepeau, Ben Chiappinelli, J.S. Grant, Jon Haynes, Robert Ashton, David Rider, Jason LaRoe, Kyle Radzyminksi, Mike Olmstead, Alece Ronzino, Nancy Ravey, Owen Bent, David Walgreen, John Cisar, Neil Vanslette, Jesse Grandshaw, BeJa, Thea Whitcomb, Chris Wyman, Rob Weeks, Rob Raymond, Richard Ballard, Josh Nacho.
published by candyhammer music (ASCAP).
© 2010 candyhammer lo-fi.
www.candyhammer.com
CHLFd1013